‘He is more involved in violence and disorder than any other defendant I have seen come through this court, adult or child.’
This comment – from the judge prosecuting a boy of only 12 for his part in the recent trial in Manchester, after the horrible murder of three little girls in Southport – has shocked many, as it has involved other children and young people.
Sadly, as a black psychotherapist working with children and young people in an NHS service in London, I am not surprised that children are among those involved.
That’s because right-wing sentiment and racism don’t suddenly appear in adulthood. It often begins in adolescence when individuals are most vulnerable to radicalization.
I often work with young people from different backgrounds, where identity issues and other sensitive topics often come up in our sessions.
Sometimes I witness the painful experience of racist, homophobic, ableist, or xenophobic bullying. At other times, such prejudice and bigotry was directed at me.
I remember working with a young boy who expressed great fear and anger about traveling in his neighborhood, which had a significant black population.
The comments escalated from vague complaints about ‘roadmen’ to racist remarks about ‘Blacks’.
He was careful to clarify that he was not referring to ‘nice Black people like me’ – as if to excuse him from subjecting me to derogatory and hateful diatribes about my group.
Over time, and with careful observation and constant reflection, I resisted the urge to punish him or become blinded by anger. All the while explaining that I am not a pocket and that my words and actions have an impact.
I said to him at the time: ‘You are trying to reassure me that you think I am a good Black person, while also trying to provoke me to react in a hostile way so that I can confirm your stereotypes.’
In the end, we can also discover that there is shame, vulnerability and helplessness beneath the hostility and provocation.
In every case like this, I am always careful about how I react and I try to focus on the meaning behind the behavior for each child. It is almost always the case that the underlying belief of hate is some of the emotions linked to the usual fear of growing up.
If, as a society, the only response to the extreme views or actions of young people is moral panic and punitive measures, we will lose sight of some of the fundamental concerns that I found in my conversations with them – worries about adolescence and navigating an uncertain future, which it can lead to violence and hatred, if left untreated.
Over time, as children and young people develop confidence, they can explore sensitive topics.
And when they say disturbing things about these topics, they don’t just reflect the state of society; they remind us that the potential for cruelty in youth is not unique to our time but is part of the broader human condition.
I explore my child’s perspective and my emotional response, which may include anger, disgust or shame.
When dealing with issues like misogyny, racism, antisemitism, and other forms of hate speech in therapy, child psychotherapists approach these conversations with curiosity. Although we are human and can be angry or angry, we try to think about the meaning of anger in relation to the patient.
But when a child expresses an offensive view, or a scary idea, I still have to resist the urge to react defensively or shut down the discussion. Or even jumping to conclusions, which will be everyone’s instinct.
Instead, I explore my child’s perspective and my emotional response, which may include anger, disgust or shame.
Adolescence is a time to strive for independence and create a unique identity. Exploring the fringes of social norms, including transgressive behavior in areas like sexuality and politics, is often part of this process.
With teenagers increasingly living online, the search for identity and peer group affiliation, a key feature of this formative stage of life, is complicated by the polarized nature of social media.
This environment can trap teenagers in an echo chamber, providing more extreme content. Far-right exploit this, offering boys and young people a simplistic explanation and a sense of belonging to respond to their teenage angst.
Manosphere or misogynist influences like Andrew Tate often come up in my sessions with children.
Although about boys who are exposed to this material, I do not think that this should mean that they will continue to have these views in adulthood.
In adolescence, there is a process of individuation, where boys can try and imitate the ‘extreme’ version of what is considered masculine. This can help them create an identity separate from girls.
Child and adolescent psychotherapist Maria Papadima wrote in a recent blog that the label ‘toxic masculinity’ is unhelpful when describing the problem. It can lead to a polarity where the psychological dimensions of the expression of masculinity of men and young men can be easily rejected.
This does not mean that we should condone violent or hateful behavior, or that it should go unpunished or unchallenged. But we must be strong enough to, in some environments, tolerate a certain level of extreme behavior or language as part of the youth – while protecting these young people from causing irreversible harm to themselves and others.
Responding in a punitive or punitive way — including treating children as adults in the justice system — may be tempting, or feel natural.
But in my opinion, it can have the opposite effect, pushing teenagers further into the hands of right-wing demagogues or extremists who offer quick and easy solutions to teenage navigation problems.
And if there is one thing I have learned in this line of work, there is no such thing as an easy solution to existence.
more information
All views are the author’s own and do not represent the position of CAMHS, the NHS, or the Child Psychotherapy Association.
To protect patient privacy and confidentiality, identifying information has been removed or redacted.
Radicalization is a serious security issue and, although it can be investigated, it should also be taken seriously and reported to the relevant legal protection/Prevention agencies.
Do you have a story you want to share? Email jess.austin@metro.co.uk.
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