BBCāI had to pull the car over and call the emergency services, and I just thought this; Iām having a heart attack.ā
John Kelly was driving to Dublin for work when he felt tightness in his chest and pins and needles in his arm.
He called an ambulance and spent the next three days in hospital for extensive tests, but it all came back.
āI was visited by a doctor who said the problem was not my heart,ā he said.
āWhen I asked him what the problem was, he pointed at my head.ā
John Kelly John has had a severe panic attack.
Before that, the Dungannon-born businessman spent most of his career in the corporate world, holding senior positions in soft drinks companies.
In the early 2000s, he started his own sales training business, and shortly after this, anxiety symptoms began.
āIāve been working alone for a few years, and I thought I was doing OK; I have a nice home, a loving family, but I feel like Iām working more and more.
āOne day, I just remember feeling like there was a fog in my brain and I didnāt know what it was, but I was still able to walk.ā
A few days later, John had his first panic attack.
Therapy
John was eventually referred by his GP for cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).
This is an NHS approved talking therapy that can help you manage your problems by changing the way you think and act.
John describes this as the beginning of his recovery.
āI would use the analogy of being in a leaky boat, then you are given the right tools.
āItās this nice bucket that helps you empty the boat of some of that water, but the boat still leaks.ā
John waited several months for his first CBT appointment through the NHS and was given an initial six sessions.
They then pay for further sessions through the private sector.
John says that CBT is the starting point of a longer journey that includes training, practice and self-reflection.
āI can reorganize my thoughts and not destroy things and know that itās just a thought, you donāt have to act, but also need self-reflection and work on yourself.
āI really thought, if this happened to me ā¦ it must have happened to someone else.ā
Over the past 20 years, problems with waiting lists and access to speech therapy have persisted.
In Northern Ireland, it is recommended that mental health support or treatment should be available for nine weeks.
But research published in June this year by Northern Irelandās mental health championās office shows this target is being missed in many cases.
Data from the Northern Ireland Life and Times Survey shows 47% of people seeking services before October 2021 did not receive effective treatment within nine weeks.
The Department of Health has admitted that health trusts are under āsignificant pressureā increasing demand for services.
A spokeswoman added that mental health strategies are being used to reduce waiting lists and support people in times of crisis.
āMany suffer in silenceā
Prof SiobhĆ”n OāNeill is a champion of Northern Irelandās mental health.
She said psychological therapy is known to be āvery effective,ā but the waiting list is simply too long.
Prof OāNeill said this led to an increase in mental health problems as many people āsuffered in silenceā.
āItās really important to see people coming forward and talking about it publicly, about how theyāre recovering and what they can do,ā he said.
After years of working on his own physical and mental health, John Kelly now works as a business coach to bring positive cultural change to organizations.
John KellyThis Thursday, he shares his story as part of the Brilliant by Design event at Belfastās Titanic Hotel.
A line-up that also includes Northern Irish rock musician and frontman The Answer and the Unholy Gospel, Cormac Neeson.
John Kelly said: āI think being on this show shows how far you can go, but thereās still a stigma around mental health.
āI just want to share my story because I think it can help others; Iām living proof that no matter how down or worried you are, things can get better.
- If you have been affected by any of the issues in this story, you can visit BBC Action Line.
